My Apologies...

Sorry Wan Nee. I didn't mean to call you bitch... It's just that I've known you for almost 8 years and you know them like wat ? 1 yr + ? "== C'mon ! Don't you treasure our long-term friendship more ? I'm super sad you know... TT How could you treat me like that... =( U talk to them more than you talk to me and you share secrets to them but not me... What am I to you... When I talk to Lian Qi or Heidi or anybody else in the class, you were always included. But when you're talking to Aevyn or Saw Hui or Sin Yee, you'll say what "这是我们世界的东西" ! Wat 我的世界，你的世界？ We are living in the same world la ! I hate when you do that. D=< I think you shouldn't talk a lot with them. U're getting more and more mysterious and you've changed a lot... =(

Today in school oso very less talk with me. Is there something wrong ? Sigh... I hope tomorrow you will communicate with me more... I cannot write much edi. Stomach pain like oh my god...! Goodnite~



*I miss the old you...

MAPLE !!!

Maple is like my life now ! I can't stop thinking about maple...


美leh... XD

Tomorrow is 话语 2 and Maths 2. Need to 发呆 before rehat... "== Pasti think about maple. Think about maple make me ki siao ! Sigh... But remember, after tomorrow got 1 week holiday !!! YEAH !!! Can concentrate on mapling. =P I hope coordinates won't come out. Damn weak in that. But Maths 2 very long la. Dunno how to survive.

Tonight at tuition so 没有面子... Science teacher ask me stand up because I dunno how to answer her quiz. Luckily I'm standing next to Mavis so not really that bad la. English time - Wan Nee, Aevyn, Sin Yee and Saw Hui all went back home. Mavis also. Ask Wan Nee why she wan go back, dun wan tell me... DUN WAN TELL MA DUN TELL LA BITCH ! I can have fun without you ! D=<

Since our friendship is getting worse, I'm not talking to you cause talking just make things worse... I can survive without you.


Hmph !!!

*Who needs you when I have Maple and food...

Rethink

Rethinking my post yesterday. Today, Lian Qi, Heidi, Wan Nee and me were talking non stop. Mostly Lian Qi, Heidi and me cause Wan Nee don't really talk much to us and she was busy with her Maths. Whole day talking about Lian Qi's cousin and stuff... Filthy stinking rich cousins. Leng zai somemore... TT I suddenly felt so poor. But at least happy.

I feel fat and sad... Not only am I fat and short but boyish too. How to find guy ? TT Sigh... Actually I have friends, just that I dunno if they're real friends. Talking about personal life - Yes. Joke with each other - Ok. Share secrets - No. I feel insecure and unconfident. Where to find some one I can trust. I think I'm gonna firstly ask if they don't like me. Straight to the point but they'll probably say nothing. Lian Qi might say something but Heidi would say nothing and Wan Nee would say 没有啦. I don't dare ask Saw Hui, Sin Yee and Aevyn. Yi Ern and Khei Lai are not comfortable with me cause they think I'm perverted. "== FYI, I'm NOT !!!

Tomorrow is exam and I'm suppose to study now but I'm on facebook reading and liking stuff. I feel like an idiot with no brain. Useless idiot. How can I change myself ? I want to ! I really, really want to ! I just can't. I think I'm too freakin lazy or just... I think it's too freakin lazy. == Currently uploading some photos to facebook. At least I got a wonderful family. We may argue and sometimes mad at each other, we're still one family. =) I got nothing else to write already so I'll post some pics then...


Angry bird cupcake


So cute lol~


Always Keep The Faith <3

Emoing is bad for health but emoing is me...

*Sad and lonely...

Midnight~

I feel tired and I'm listening to some sad songs while emoing. I wanna sleep le but my fingers suddenly click on my blog so.... I got nothing to write and it's like 1am now. Wednesday is exam le. Why am I feeling so down now... =( Something is aching in my heart but I dunno wat. I've been wanting to post my true feelings on the blog... I dun think anybody will be reading my blog since it's been abandoned for quite some time. Well then, here it goes:

I think I dun have true friends. I'm smiling on the outside but they don't actually talk to me much. Yi Ern is always with Khei Lai and Joey. Hooi Shin and Meng Yeng are also with Yi Ern, Khei Lai and Joey. Wan Nee is closer to Aevyn and Sin Yee. Saw Hui, Aevyn and Sin Yee are a tight group and I just can't communicate with them. I'm good friends with Lian Qi but nothing can come between Heidi and Lian Qi. I don't really know if I can unlock my heart and put my trust in them.

School is killing me. Not only homeworks but teachers and 'friendships'... How can I know if they're really my friends... Exams are near and I'm still not studying. I'm becoming more of a rebel. Besides school life, I'm also chasing Korean stars. Buying their merchandise, finding news about them but sometimes I feel like it's wasting my time. I dun mean it to be bad but I should try to spend time more wisely. Wasting money on unnecessary stuffs. Eating like there's no tomorrow. No wonder I'm growing fatter. I'm short... It's killing me. I wasted my childhood by not going to a better school and not learning Mandrin was my deepest regret.

I feel like such a desperate person. Everyday watching couples go by is hurtful. All those beautiful girls with such slim body is torture. Their bodies are to-die-for. Saw Hui is such a sociable person. I feel like a fat, ugly and short idiot... Whenever I see guys around, I feel like smiling and crying at the same time... I think I'm a psycho or maniac or someone crazy. *Sigh* I can't even do house chores properly. How am I suppose to live my life. I'm young and I'm still trying to learn from my mistakes. I dunno how to properly express what I'm actually going through.

I live, learn and laugh but I also feel pain, sadness and jealousy. Now all I'm doing is writing this post full of regrets, feelings and naive-ness. I really want to be a good person but to be a good person is so hard. You'll have to be kind, patient and all those good morals. I want to be loved by my friends and someone special. I hope that when I go to bed now, I can suppress my sadness and wake up to a better tomorrow...

I'll try to be a better person and a healthy child...

By,

A Regretful Person

*By the way, I love you, H...